Jokes/pickuplines"es
- Thread starter KillerSK
- Start date
Last edited:
"you need to think here" maybe if youre Klovn and as smart as the rest of us
You mean "and not as smart"?
And well, "and then it hit me" is something you often say, before you say something more.
Whenever your ex says "You'll never find someone like me" the answer to that is "That's the point"
When your ex says "you'll never find someone like me" the answer to that is "i hope so"
If a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.
THIS IS IT GUYS. THE DAY WE ALL HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR..... PICKUP MONDAY! Beneath this is sentence are 10 pickup lines which SURELY will get you somewhere. Some of them will get you a rejection but SOME of them will get you, your next girlfriend!!!!! Pick(up) carefully.
There is only one thing I want to change about you. Your last name.
You really shouldn't use make-up. You are messing with perfection.
Can I ask you to leave please? You are making all the other women look bad.
Sorry I keep staring at you. I'm just wondering where you hide your wings.
Pizza is my favorite thing to eat in bed.
Are you religious because you are the answer to all my prayers.
You like sleeping? Me too! We should do it together one time.
Your dad must be rich, because when I look into your eyes I see diamonds.
Pick a number between 1-10. If I get this number right I get to have sex with you tonight. If I get this number wrong you get to have sex with me tonight.
I will show you a magic trick. Tonight.. I will make a baby appear. In your belly.
There is only one thing I want to change about you. Your last name.
You really shouldn't use make-up. You are messing with perfection.
Can I ask you to leave please? You are making all the other women look bad.
Sorry I keep staring at you. I'm just wondering where you hide your wings.
Pizza is my favorite thing to eat in bed.
Are you religious because you are the answer to all my prayers.
You like sleeping? Me too! We should do it together one time.
Your dad must be rich, because when I look into your eyes I see diamonds.
Pick a number between 1-10. If I get this number right I get to have sex with you tonight. If I get this number wrong you get to have sex with me tonight.
I will show you a magic trick. Tonight.. I will make a baby appear. In your belly.
klovn : Why does married women weight more than single women?
Because single women go home, look what's in the fridge, and go to bed. While married women go home, look what's in the bed, and go to the fridge....
One buttock to the other: Shouldn't we try to be friends? There have been so much shit between us...
Mixed feelings, is when mother in law drives out of a deep abyss, with no chance of survival, but in your new car....
What did one wall say to another? We meet on the corner. Haha ikr
If a girl tells you that she's cold
Tell her to go to the corner, there's 90 degrees.
I just read the first sentence .
I thought it was up to the 4 children
Because single women go home, look what's in the fridge, and go to bed. While married women go home, look what's in the bed, and go to the fridge....
One buttock to the other: Shouldn't we try to be friends? There have been so much shit between us...
Mixed feelings, is when mother in law drives out of a deep abyss, with no chance of survival, but in your new car....
What did one wall say to another? We meet on the corner. Haha ikr
If a girl tells you that she's cold
Tell her to go to the corner, there's 90 degrees.
I just read the first sentence .
I thought it was up to the 4 children
Last edited:
Holy moly Sophie is dating Joey, and they're doing dogy while being stony, with tony, but sophie is an oldie, so it's closely grossly, but she is lonely, so she needs some coldly, soapy, pepperoni, with macaroni, and mostly some homely karaoke. But she's cocci and toady so she wants a ceremony with ghostly telephony and boldly nucleoli.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: 'Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: 'The driver just insulted me!' The man says: 'You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.
Little Billy came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. When his Dad came home Billy said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are his legs sticking in the air?" His father thinking quickly said, "Son, that's so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven." "Gee Dad that's great," said little Billy. A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Billy rushed out to meet him yelling, "Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!" "What do you mean?" said Dad. "Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air screaming, "Jesus I'm coming, I'm coming" If it hadn't of been for Uncle George holding her down we'd have lost her for sure!" - damn you uncle George!
Little Billy came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. When his Dad came home Billy said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are his legs sticking in the air?" His father thinking quickly said, "Son, that's so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven." "Gee Dad that's great," said little Billy. A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Billy rushed out to meet him yelling, "Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!" "What do you mean?" said Dad. "Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air screaming, "Jesus I'm coming, I'm coming" If it hadn't of been for Uncle George holding her down we'd have lost her for sure!" - damn you uncle George!